everyman

For the sole purpose of feeling real again, I needed to feel pain. The life I’ve led while still in service (9 months in) hasn’t been one of comfort. It’s been the exact opposite actually, especially when I find myself looking forward to the weekends. But it feels like Monday morning I put on a straightjacket and duct tape over my mouth, stay pacified for the next five days until Friday to be released. I am the employee with half-opened eyes, half-assed commitment who left his ounce of damn at home. Or whatever’s left of it. I’m one of the many everyman who aspires to be like Tyler Durden. Does this sound a little too much like Fight Club to you now? There’s no Marla. She left a while ago. If getting beaten and thrown every weekend keeps things real, I’m in. After last weekend I only speak in vowels with tongue against teeth to force out a consonant but pain never felt so good.

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